fury

rollercoaster, you're all i need.
up and down, i come back to you. i meet you, you meet me. i can never get away from you, escape you. you have me, you have my heart, when i said i give you me, Father i gave you me forever. this season, you still got me, Father how could that be? how could you love me the same? not being captivated all the time by your love, ignoring WHO YOU ARE
who you are, and who you always will be. and Father I am YOURS. how could this be?

spill your glory, all over my heart. Father, captivate me again i cant even believe this is who i am now.
daily, i let you slip. i let you slip through right through.

Father, i learn daily i know less about you, i am smaller than the day before. i keep growing.. smaller.

i will hold, i still sit still, i will breathe you in, in andOUTANDINANDINOUT.
you are who i want. nothing more, nothing less. nothing anything outside of that.
you are ..All.
anywhere youre not, Father. i do not want to be. let me grab onto this and hold it and let it out and breathe it out and scream it out FATHER SET MY HEART IN FURY FOR YOU, AGAINST MYSELF, THIS LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE OF OTHERS, OF EVERYONE, TO LOVE AND TO BREATHE OUT LOVE, FATHER, LET ME KNOW AND LOVE AND LOVE AND KNOW YOU AND NOTHINGOUTSIDEOFTHAT. oh My God i miss you more than i know what to do with. i do not even know where to start, this mess, this REPAIR you're about to create and take in WHY OH WHY OH WHY oh my God, this line Father screams it out best..

"and my heart turns violently INSIDE OF MY CHEST and i dont have time to MAINTIN THESE REGRETS when i think about .. the way YOU LOVE ME"

always, never have you given up on me, let go.